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Joke of the Day
"I tried to come out of the closet by singing. It was my swan song"
Next Joke
"What did the volcano say to the other volcano? Do you lava me like I lava you?"
"Why are there rugs in front of the stove and the sink? So women know where to stand in the kitchen."
"Me: I'm going to bed after this episode. Netflix: Hahahahahaha! Sure. Ok."
"Everybody's getting Oreos with their Christmas cards this year. Related: Don't eat cookies while you're licking envelopes."
"What I reply with when someone asks, ""What'd the comment say?"" [Removed]"
"Being a newspaper boy combines two of my favorite things: legally throwing things at people's houses & keeping my fellow citizens informed"
"I never could bring a woman into my house. At first, because of the parents. Later, because of the wife."
"Anyone know how to fix a guardian angel, I think mine is broken."
"""Wolfgang Mozart"", says Mozart's friend... ""What?!"" replies Mozart. Then they are both eaten by a gang of wolves."