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Joke of the Day
"What's a scientist's favorite gum flavor? .......Ex-*spearmint*."
Next Joke
"How did the New Orlean Pelicans get their name? They should've gone with the Hurricanes."
"Relationship Status: changing locks"
"You guys have been the worst hostages I've ever used, hands down. *everyone lowers their hands* GODDAMN IT!!"
"A Cuban, a Canadian, and a homophobic walk into a bar The bartender says, ""What'll it be, Senator Cruz?"""
"What kind of sound does a whorn make? A prostitoot."
"I just can't wrap my head around decapitation."
"Do vegetarians eat animal crackers?"
"Who the hell came up with 'prolly' for probably?"
"A woman turns to her husband and asks... ""Dear, how many women have you slept with?"" He replied, ""Just you dear, the other ones kept me awake."""