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Joke of the Day

"I haven't heard a good poop joke in a while... find them all to be a bit corny."

"Halloween and Valentine's day are pretty much the same thing... people dress up and pretend to be someone they're not for some sugar"

"why didn't the clothing drive at the homeless shelter not work out? ..nobody gave a shirt."

"If i don't get a B+ or better on the Emergency Broadcast System Test this Saturday. My mom said she's taking my iPhone away for a month."

"Did you hear about the albino fortune-teller who died in the house fire? She was a rare medium, well-done."

"I Like My Coffee Like I Like My Slaves... Free."

"How do you know if your room mate is gay? his dick tastes like shit"

"90% of your body is water. 6% is delusion. 4% is lies."

"My friend said he had a hole in his sock. I replied, ""Darn it!"""

"When I like a girl, I play it cool. I wait. I text once, wait 60 years, and then I die."