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Joke of the Day

"Last night, I had dinner at one of those illicit restaurants where you can dine on endangered species. I left there full of egret."

"I lost my mood ring.. I'm not sure how i feel about this."

"Going out with two gay men tonight; I know they're my competition, but I've seen them consume bananas and I think I can take them."

"Donald Trump is the candy corn of politicians Part white, part orange and sickening in large doses"

"What do Greek soccer players wear? Soccer tee's"

"What did the cat cough up when it was sick? Meowcus"

"Did you hear the joke about the roof? I would tell you, but it tends to go over people's heads"

"I pulled a muscle masturbating... I know, I know; you're not supposed to put the punchline in the title."

"Helium is a limited resource and we could run out of it in our lifetime... Balloon prices are going to go sky high."

"How does moses make his tea? Hebrews it"