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Joke of the Day

"What do you call a vulture with no beak? A head banger."

"what do you call water that bounces? Spring water."

"What's a pirate's favorite letter of the alphabet? you: R? One might think it's the R, but really, it's the C."

"I once mowed the lawn at a battered women's shelter if you know what i mean"

"I wonder if black ants and red ants have beef. I never see them chilling together. Ever."

"When I'm not anxious I'm anxious about it."

"You guys ever seen a cockatoo? Yeah? I bet you have."

"I HAVE BEEN TO FOUR DIFFERENT FABRIC STORES LOOKING FOR THIS 'WIFEY MATERIAL'! WHERE COULD THIS TYPE OF MATERIAL BE!?"

"Why isn't Sonic the Hedgehog Muslim? Because once Ramadan is over, he can't stop fasting!"

"What Austrian girls and wine have in common? Both mature in a cellar."