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Joke of the Day

"What's a pirate's favorite letter of the alphabet? you: R? One might think it's the R, but really, it's the C."

"A Mick and Wop walk into a sub shop One orders the Italian, the other orders a filthy stinking drunk."

"So annoying how every time I go to sleep, my wife starts whispering into my ear ""Go towards the light."""

"What's the difference between peanut butter and jam? You can't peanut butter a dick up your arse."

"What's the difference between a dirty bus stop and a lobster with breast implants? one's a crusty bus station and the other is a busty crustacean"

"I failed my Health and Safety Test today apparently when they ask what steps you should take in case of a fire, large ones was not the correct answer"

"I became a vegetarian yesterday. I regret it already, I guess you can say it was a missed steak."

"Facebook told me my new password was too long... All I typed in was ""My Dick""."

"I started 2016 with a goal to lose 20 pounds Only 30 more to go and I'm there!"

"How do you find an obese woman's vagina in the dark? Go through the folds of fat until you smell shit, then go back one."