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Joke of the Day

"How are the homeless like votes? Republicans have them thrown out."

"An apple a day will keep anyone away if you throw it hard enough."

"Brian Williams told me if I lied I can get to the front page."

"I found an ant in the men's restroom. Why an Aunt? I can understand why an Uncle would be in there."

"heres a bad joke your life"

"Why the chicken cross the road? To look for his cock."

"Teacher: ""When was Rome built?"" Pupil: ""At night."" Teacher: ""Why did you say that?"" Pupil: ""Because my dad always says that Rome wasn't built in a day!"""

"10,000 worth of devices were stolen from an apple store last night. Police are hopeful that the 3 phones will be found."

"In a recent drug use quiz at work, I won. Nobody got higher than me."

"I have a dog named Lucky... Sometimes he escapes so we have to go get Lucky. And sometimes it'll be dark out so we'll be up all night to get Lucky."