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Joke of the Day
"It's the eye of the tiger. It's the spleen of a sheep."
Next Joke
"That awkward moment when you lazily follow someone cos of 1 funny joke, then realize all the rest of their stuff is KKK recruitment material"
"Do you know the one step to avoiding clickbait? Obviously not. gg y'all, inbox = rekt"
"Is Google a male or a female? Female, because it doesn't let you finish a sentence before making a suggestion."
"God: I will create a being to cook, clean, serve and obey. Adam: what will it cost me? God: an arm and a leg. Adam: what can I get for a rib"
"Going to How to Train Your Dragon tomorrow... Or marriage guidance counselling as the wife calls it."
"What's the difference between Batman and a black man? Batman can go in a store without Robin"
"Jehovah Witnesses keep coming to my house... So today I decided to answer the door naked and... Well...I solved the Girl Scout problem...."
"I wonder if this whole Ebola thing is going to go viral Thoughts?"
"I'm gonna drag a terrified family into a shack in the woods at knife point but then just make them have a Wii bowling tournament with me."