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Joke of the Day

"This ones for those college students and there finals This is really just a good analogy. Finals are like plastic surgery, you go in with A's and you come out with D's!"

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"When I was 6, Santa gave me coal for Christmas, so the next year I decided to get back at him and poison his cookies. Somehow, the bastard found out and killed my dad."
"What's the hardest part of a vegetable to eat? The wheelchair."
"What do a woman and a bar have in common? Liquor in the front, poker in the back."
"Last year I took a visual design class... ...and our final exam was to design a fireworks display. I passed with flying colors."
"""Thanks for sending me that 17 second cellphone video from that concert you went to! The audio and video were amazing!"" - said no one, ever"
"LIFE HACK: give ur next child a normal name ME: are u still mad that ur mother and i named u Life Hack"
"What do you call a pile of kittens? A Meow-tain"
"My dick is so big that a JPEG picture of it cannot be stored in a FAT formatted drive."
"How do you call a cow without legs? Ground beef"