70481

Joke of the Day

"From my not quite 3yr old cousin. Q:Why did the doggy cross the road? A:To get to the bone! Q:Why did the bone cross the road? A: To get away!"

"PC gamers don't take hot showers. They take Steam-y ones."

"Doesn't say much for humanity that the most popular are also the least interesting."

"Why shouldn't you use red, white, and blue paint in a watercolor? Because these colors don't run"

"Twitter birth control: airfare"

"TIFU by accidentally eating my friend's sandwich from Subway Oops, wrong sub."

"Mr. Schneider stood up in court. ""As God is my judge I do not owe my ex-wife any money."" Glaring down at him the judge replied ""He's not. I am. You do."""

"I dropped acid this morning The teacher made us evacuate the lab."

"""Fine, I'm sorry, you win, just, please stop crying."" - my rap battle opponent"

"How many Egalitarians does it take to screw in a light bulb? Doesn't matter, they'll just screw it one rotation one way and one rotation the other way and call it equality."