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Joke of the Day

"A woman files for divorce from her husband... citing that he makes too many Star Wars puns. When asked if this is true the husband says, ""Divorce is strong with this one."""

"Why couldn't the melon couple run off and get married? Because they can't elope."

"Stevie Wonder Have you seen Stevie Wonders wife & kids lately? - No? Neither has he"

"Why does santa have such a big sack? Cause he only comes once a year."

"Don't play stupid with me.. That's a game you won't win"

"I don't think of women as just nice tits, a sweet ass, a pretty face or any single one of their parts... ... I think of them as a hole."

"Why did Billy not care who he offended while posting on the internet? Because the ends justify the memes"

"I think parents are incredibly selfish and rude for having additional children without first consulting their existing child. "

"Longest minutes ever: 1. Waiting on a text 2. Waiting on your food to get out the microwave 3. Commercial while watching a good show."

"Me and my Italian friend are opening a Chinese restaurant... It's called 2 Dum Wops"