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Joke of the Day
"I just saw a group of pandas pooping on the ground together What an embarrassment"
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"You gotta hand it to blind prostitutes Literally"
"When asked why he wouldn't upgrade his operating system to Windows 8... Arnold Schwarzenegger replied: 'Windows 8, never! I still love Vista baby'..."
"I hit a deer last night. It died instantly. I feel awful, but when I'm jogging I'm in my own world."
"Why will the next IPhones be the hottest best selling phones? Because they'll be sexy(6c) and a success(6s)"
"Climb mountains not so the world can see you, but so you can see the world."
"Excuses are like assholes... Fuck 'em"
"What did the hobo say to the prostitute? Hey girl, I'd sleep in that box."
"Why are black people so tall? Because their knee grows!"
"Watch I was walking down the street one night and a guy came up to me and said, ""Can I piss on your wrist?"" I said, ""Not on my watch"""