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Joke of the Day

"Wanna hear a bondage joke? Sorry I'm all tied up at the moment"

"What's the best part about having a dog lick peanut butter off your balls? Finishing."

"What do you call a baby girl who died of alcohol poisoning? Give me a blender and we'll call her a bloody mary."

"Let's all take a moment to honor National Punctuation Day because life would be: very, confusing! Without it?"

"*corrects your grammar incorrectly, winks at your date*"

"Relationship status: my period comes more often than I do."

"The only double penetrating I'll ever do is eating the double stuff Oreo I just dropped into my coffee."

"Donald Trump will ban the sale of shredded cheese He wants to make America grate again"

"One man's porn is another man's...well, porn, really. It's pretty much all porn for us. Nice sweater."

"Doctor doctor I keep thinking I'm a computer. My goodness you'd better come to my surgery right away! I can't my power cable won't reach that far."