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Joke of the Day

"Doctor doctor I keep thinking I'm a computer. My goodness you'd better come to my surgery right away! I can't my power cable won't reach that far."

"""Good morning, Urology Department... Can you hold?"""

"With your current salary what Apple product can you buy? Apple juice"

"What kind of jokes does a mute clown tell? Dumb ones!"

"Horrible news. My nephew was on a bus traveling on a foggy mountain road in Chile. Then he got those big stupid disks put in his earlobes."

"What's the other word for a pedophile with a large hat? The Pope. (sorry if repost, my friend just told it to me)"

"I tried publishing my novel... in which I stress the danger of global warming by describing my experience battling encroaching fire ant colonies. Every publisher called it ant-I-climatic."

"Q: How many Englishmen does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: What do you mean change it? It's a perfectly good bloody bulb! We have had it for a thousand years and it has worked just *fine*."

"Everybody needs a bosom for a pillow Mines made of mammary foam"

"How do you find the richest man in Mexico Throw a penny and see who catches it"