229257

Joke of the Day

"Doctor doctor I keep thinking I'm a computer. My goodness you'd better come to my surgery right away! I can't my power cable won't reach that far."

"What did the Mexican name his two dicks? Jose and Hose B"

"My Dream is to Become the World's Best Procrastinator... But I'll start chasing my dreams another day, I don't feel like it now."

"What did the egg say to the boiling water? ""How can you expect me to get hard so fast? I just got laid a minute ago."""

"AlgeBron James is the best mathlete in the league"

"I recently got crushed by a pile of books, but I suppose I have only my shelf to blame."

"[Bank] COP: [through megaphone] LET ONE OF THE HOSTAGES GO ROBBER: Okay, who wants out? ME: [spinning on bosses chair] I'm comfortable."

"Now that Fall is here, do you think all the teenage girls with duck-faces will fly South for the winter?"

"3 Mods walk into a bar [deleted]"

"According to a dating app, Amazon employees are more desirable than employees at other tech companies. Plus, if you sleep with one, they will recommend someone else you might also like."