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Joke of the Day

"What do teenage terrorists drink? Smirnoff ISIS"

Next Joke
 
"I just got one of those workout watches apparently i've masturbated 5.8 miles today"
"A nurse finds a rectal thermometer in her pocket. She says ""Oh great, some guy has my pen"""
"Guy in the dressing room next to mine: ""I don't want to get blood on these pants."" I want to reply, ""Then stay out of my way on the catwalk"""
"An actor was fired from a movie for being a cocaine addict. He kept blowing his lines."
"Q: How do you keep a blonde in suspense? A: Give her a mirror and tell her to wait for the other person to say 'hi.'"
"People say there is safety in numbers... Tell that to 6,000,000 jews."
"What do you call bears with no ears? b"
"Chemistry teacher: What is Nitrate? Girl: My place, 250...your place 400!"
"What do u call a lesbian with 9in fingers? Well hung."