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Joke of the Day

"What is Irish and sits on your deck? Patty O'Furniture !"

"Patron: Waiter why is there a spider in my glass? Waiter: It scares away the flies."

"I signed up for an exercise class and was told to wear loose fitting clothing. If I HAD any loose fitting clothing, I wouldn't have signed up in the first place!"

"I've finally reached the age where I can't function without my glasses...especially if they're empty."

"They say if your erection lasts... They say if your erection lasts more than 4 hours that you should call a doctor... I say you should tell your wife to call some friends!"

"Did you hear about the birds who wanted to go out drinking? They ended up at the crowbar."

"What's the difference between Jesus and a whore? The expression on their face when they're getting nailed."

"How do you make Donald Trump laugh? tickle his armpits"

"Apparently White men can't jump! Yeah? well black men can't act!"

"You know how I deal with migraines? I store them in migranary."