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Joke of the Day
"What is an Arkansas virgin? A girl who can run faster than her brothers."
Next Joke
"Why did they plant trees in Harlem? Public transportation."
"""We're still looking for a side project"" Tornado: *raises hand* we could flip houses ""We've been over this, it's not what you think it is"""
"If twitter isn't a drug then someone please explain to me why I sneak into the bathroom at work to use it."
"I like my drinks like I like my women. Whatever's available."
"How do you make holy water? You boil the hell out of it"
"What have sex, money and depression in common? You don't talk about them, you have them."
"Do you know how many 3rd party sects the catholic church is protecting? None, catholics aren't allowed to have protected sects."
"How many police officers does it take to change a light bulb? None, because they'll just beat the room for being black!"
"My wife fell asleep during American Idol, so I got up like a fat ninja and turned hockey on. Then, I whispered to myself ""I run this house"""