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Joke of the Day
"Why did Julius Caesar want to quit politics? All that backstabbing was too much for him."
Next Joke
"Do I just call you or should we resolve this quickly with 200 text messages?"
"What did Simon's dad, Paul, say to his son to encourage him just before he went to compete in the National Leg Breaking Championships? ""Have a good one, son."""
"What's nine inches long, has a bright purple top, and made my wife cry when I fed it to her after jamming it up her ass? Her stillbirth"
"What did baby corn say to mama corn? Where's popcorn?"
"I am your Doctor. Sorry to inform you that you have a brain problem. Your brain is in 2 parts... Left and right. The left part has nothing right in it, and the right has nothing left in it'"
"What does Mrs Claus say to Santa when he's not spending enough time with her? You're getting too wrapped up in your work!"
"Hey y'all, I finally got a smart phone. I'm a big girl now! Anyone got a 5 year old I can borrow to teach me how to use the damn thing?"
"Your ex-girlfriend has endorsed you on LinkedIn for ""Ignoring Glaring Personal Issues!"""
"How many software engineers does it take to change a light bulb? None - its a hardware problem"