63017

Joke of the Day

"Steve Harvey"

"""Penguins mate for life. Isn't that romantic?"" You open your mouth to answer but I spit my chewed up cake into it. ""You're my penguin."""

"When someone yawns, I like to yell ""Surprise Dentist!"" and stick my hand in their mouth, which is fun because I'm not really a dentist."

"This time of year, I get sick of everyone writing an ""X"" instead of ""Christ"". I think it's time we all put the Christ back in Christ-box 360"

"I don't have a pet so I decided to adopt the spider living in the corner of my kitchen. Her name is Monique. I hope she isn't knocked up."

"I was listening to the comedy station today and Bill Cosby came on. I fell asleep shortly thereafter."

"I just climbed a mountain of fish, or you could say... I scaled it."

"Keep talking, someday you'll say something intelligent!"

"Kermit and Miss Piggy never married. He has Kermitment issues."

"[HIGHLY OFFENSIVE] TRANSGENDER MORE THAN MEETS THE EYE"