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Joke of the Day

"I have the body of a 25 year old supermodel, but it takes up too much space in my freezer."

"If Hillary Clinton and Donald Drumpf are in a boat and it capsizes. Who survives? America."

"What did the number 0 say to 8. Nice belt."

"My friend is so stupid he thinks that an autograph is a chart showing sales figures for cars."

"[In a chair] Leans back Leans back Leans ba... [Ambulance]"

"16: I hate old people. Me: That's where you and I are different. 16: You like old people?! Me: No, I hate everybody."

"Why did the neck bone explode? It was C4."

"If some last names were an ancestor's profession (Baker, Cobbler) How do you explain Dickinson?"

"When I die... I just want 2016 to be my pallbearer, so it can let me down one last time."

"I wanted to make a ""two drums and a cymbal fall off of a cliff"" joke, but um... ...tsh."