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Joke of the Day

"16: I hate old people. Me: That's where you and I are different. 16: You like old people?! Me: No, I hate everybody."

"You guys excited for Christmas? Only 366 more days :D"

"What do you call a cow with no sense of humor? Moody."

"A carnival worker plans to sue after recently being fired. His lawyers say it is a clear case of funfair dismissal."

"REPUBLICANS: I can't believe Trump won. DEMOCRATS: I can't believe Hillary lost. ME: I can't believe it's not butter!"

"In the 1945-6 Nuremberg Trials what should have been the opening statement from the defence counsel representing the Nazi War criminals? 'If you can't say anything nice, don't say anything at all.'"

"On Average, ovulating women prefer rugged & masculine men. Menstruating women prefer men duct-taped and on fire."

"A Mexican Magician During his performance, he says: ""On the count of three, I will disappear! "" So he starts counting... UNO... DOS.... and then suddenly he disappears without a tres."

"How to celebrate 4/20 Guide your newborn son into becoming an evil dictator and slaughter most of the Jewish population."

"Why do they refer to network ports as female? Because when they stop talking to you, you never know why."