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Joke of the Day

"I went camping in the snow. As the snow melted, water leaked in. It was the winter of my discount tent."

"What did the fish say to the man draining its aquarium? WATER YOU DOING"

"Q: What kind of a car does a crazy man drive? A: A LOCOmotive."

"Why was Skippy falsely imprisoned? Because it was a kangaroo court."

"Q: Did you hear what the blonde who was opening a new bar said when her lawyer explained to her that she needed a liquor license? A: ""Oh it's not gonna be THAT kind of a bar. That's disgusting!"""

"You know times are tough when you are totally jealous of your friends shopping spree... at the dollar store!"

"The only way to open a pack of toilet paper is to fingerblast a hole through the plastic in one of the roll hollows."

"My favorite machine at the gym is the one you put change in and snacks come out"

"Her: I LOVE your beard! Me: Thanks, yours is coming in nicely, too! Flirting with women my age is hard, guys."

"Okay kids, always remember: you are what you eat So eat loads of sweets and pass on those vegetables"