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Joke of the Day

"Her: I LOVE your beard! Me: Thanks, yours is coming in nicely, too! Flirting with women my age is hard, guys."

"Me: Hey, I'm going to say a knock knock joke, but you have to start me off! Them: Okay.. knock knock Me: Who's there? Them: *confused silence*"

"Chuck Norris is the only man who has, literally, beaten the odds. With his fists."

"My toddler begged to go swimming and then threw a tantrum because she didn't want to get wet in case you were on the fence about having kids"

"How many performance artists does it take to change a lightbulb? I don't know, I left early."

"The new British PM has been spotted performing necromantic rituals over Margaret Thatcher's grave... She May be planning Theresa corpse."

"Cops don't like it when you ask them ""Need some help?"" especially when you're wearing a Batman costume."

"Why did the boy drop his ice cream cone? Because he got hit by a truck."

"Contrary to popular belief, everyone wasn't Kung Fu fighting, I was taking a nap."

"Why did the english student get an F? His poem had ABAD rhyme pattern."