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Joke of the Day
"What do the Egyptians call a man who cannot keep his opinions to himself? IMHOtep"
Next Joke
"How does a penguin build its house ? Igloos it together"
"[dont let him know you're a sponge] Waitress: *spills drink on table* GERONIMO *bellyflops on table* SPRAY SOME CLEANER I GOT THIS oh damn"
"I need to get my spine removed.. It's been holding me back my whole life"
"Good luck listening to 80's music without imagining my silhouette doing karate poses."
"And we're still calling it auto ""correct"" because...."
"If I had to choose between a stepstool and a device that let's me get even higher... ...I'd take the ladder. (I'll just leave now)"
"My Boss asked me to put two pieces of wood together... I nailed it! My friend Steve figured I would of screwed it up."
"If Women Ruled the World"
"Patient: Doc, my stomach is killing me. DR DOG: *scratches chin* Have you tried eating grass?"