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Joke of the Day
"Pedophiles are fucking immature assholes"
Next Joke
"I can totally keep secrets! It's the people I tell them to that can't!"
"Contrary to popular belief, everyone wasn't Kung Fu fighting, I was taking a nap."
"My kid sold your honor student a quarter ounce of oregano."
"Why does a chicken coop only have two doors? Because if it had four doors it'd be a chicken sedan."
"A blind man walks into a bar... and he falls down and asks for help."
"Next time you think you're weird think about how Walt Disney had a fetish for ducks and mice in high heels and shitload of mascara."
"Puns about women are not funny. Period."
"You know what really surprised me about the debate tonight? Turns out it *is* possible to have a worse moderator than the team over at /r/news!"
"I went to the zoo . . . I went to the zoo, and in the entire place, they only had one dog. It was a shih tzu."