58598

Joke of the Day

"What's the difference between a BMW and a porcupine? A porcupine has its pricks on the outside."

"Hate to be that guy.... ... because he's a dick. Fuck him."

"Did you hear about the rabbi who had a wallet made out of foreskins? He could rub it and turn it into a suitcase."

"Me: Okay 2 it's time for bed 2: NO! Mommy go to bed Me: Okay *goes to bed"

"How is American beer similar to having sex in a canoe? It's fucking close to water. (A Canadian just told me this joke)"

"A neutron went into a bar and asked the bartender, ""How much for a beer?""The bartender replied, ""For you, no charge."""

"Why couldn't the lifeguard save the hippie? He was too far out, man"

"I'm really tired all the time, I think I have stereo... It's like I have mono times two"

"What's the difference between a peeping Tom and someone who's just got out of the bath? One is rude and nosey. The other is nude and rosey!"

"Why are monsters hipsters? Because they've been coming out of the closet since before it was cool."