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Joke of the Day

"How do Jews shower? The same as you idiot. First we get nice and we.. Wait, it's a trap! The gas its too mu... faint scream"

"Why do elephants paint their balls red? So they can hide in apple trees. What's the loudest noise in the jungle? A giraffe eating apples."

"Isn't Twitter basically all NSFW since we all tweet while we're at work & hit the 'Close Tab' button like a ninja when the boss walks by?"

"How are marriage and commiting suicide the same? You are really good at it if you have only had to do it once. Edit: Joke idea taken from a /r/showerthoughts post."

"Asked my 65yo mom what she'd like for Christmas and she said ""Surprise me"". Hope she likes her new pet python."

"From the pilot during his welcome message: ""We are pleased to have some of the best flight attendants in the industry... Unfortunately none of them are on this flight."

"Why did the French police arrested the Muslim teenager? Because he was trying to detonate a Samsung Note 7."

"Why haven't you ever seen a hippo hiding in a tree? Because they are really good at it."

"DJ Daemon maintains the beats in the background."

"Did you hear the one about Make-A-Wish foundation giving concert tickets to the little deaf boy? Neither did he."