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Joke of the Day

"Why did the French police arrested the Muslim teenager? Because he was trying to detonate a Samsung Note 7."

"[Vegan Conference] Announcer: While we await our key speaker, please talk among yourselves Vegan: I'm a vegan Vegan2: I'm also a vegan"

"what do you call a Canadian alien? ehh lmao"

"Most of being a parent means saying ""Great!!"" when your kid insists you watch him perform an unidentifiable skill."

"Whats the difference between congress and parliament? Ones filled with a bunch of baboons and the other just doesn't give a hoot during the day."

"What kind of cologne applies itself? Elon Musk"

"I've never understood the whole 'burying people for fun at the beach'. The cops will just find the bodies when the tide comes"

"Did you know that every frog used to have at least some polish genes? In fact, they were a tad-pole."

"I can't wait till next years veterans day: for the ones that didn't get captured...."

"I learned that 17th century French royalty depleted their treasury... I guess you could say they were baroque."