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Joke of the Day

"Huh, maybe THIS pizza delivery guy will be the father figure I've been looking for"

"/r/Jokes hits 2 Million subscribers **/r/Jokes metrics:** Total Subscribers: 2,006,077 Subreddit Rank: 35 Subreddit Growth & Milestones: http://redditmetrics.com/r/Jokes"

"Having bad dreams is the best way to prove you can't even do being unconscious right."

"The Packers or the Colts. Take your Pick"

"Did you hear about the infection who made a Youtube video? He went viral..."

"my friends are getting married and i'm here wondering what the diff between a soft taco and a burrito and if i should get both for dinner"

"How did Harry Potter get down the hill? Walking. JK Rowling."

"[at a fancy restuarant] WIFE: make sure u leave a good tip ME: ok [writing on bill] ""only evolve ur pokemon when uve activated a lucky egg"""

"How many sorority girls does it take to change a lightbulb? Seven. One to change it, two to take pictures, and four to make t-shirts for the event."

"I am a simple man with simple jokes. A tumblrite came up to me and told me I needed to respect her being a pansexual. I said ""why do you want to fuck bread? You'll get a yeast infection."""