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Joke of the Day

"Turns out my vasectomy didn't stop us from having more kids. Turns out my vasectomy didn't stop us from having more kids, it just made them a different colour."

"What do you get if you breed a hedgehog and a grass snake? *Interbreed. A meter of barbed wire. It's funnier in Russian"

"I ran out of bread this morning, so I asked my Indian neighbor if he had any But he said he had naan..."

"NYPD officers accidentally shot two tourists in Times Square, but in the cop's defense, the tourists were about to eat at Olive Garden"

"Dad: ""Son, if you don't stop masturbating you're gonna go blind."" Son: ""I'm over here Dad."""

"What's the difference between Tuna, a Piano, and a bottle of Glue? You can tuna piano, but you can't piano a tuna!"

"feedback 4 people revving motorbikes loud in residential areas: there is absolutely 0% chance that u r impressing literally a single person"

"why did the plant cross the road? it can't, its a plant. DUH"

"I'm starting a secret society for people who have been banned from other secret societies. It's called The Illuminaughty. (Don't tell anyone, though. It's a secret.)"

"What is the one type of person that will never get angry? A nomad."