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Joke of the Day

"NYPD officers accidentally shot two tourists in Times Square, but in the cop's defense, the tourists were about to eat at Olive Garden"

Next Joke
 
"Did you hear about... ...the optometrist who fell in his lens grinder? He made a spectacle of himself."
"No matter what has happened. No matter what you've done. No matter what you will do. I will always love you. I swear it."
"I ruined my health by drinking to everyone else's."
"Alexa, take down my Christmas decorations."
"My new neighbour is fat, obnoxious and loud... Now I know how Canada feels"
"A wizard walks into a gay bar... ...And disappears with a poof."
"I currently live in a college apartment with four other dudes... we go through toilet paper like Hitler went through the Jews"
"What do you get is you cross a ghost with a packet of potato chips? Snacks that go crunch in the night."
"moses: watch me split the red sea in half red sea: i've got a boyfriend"