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Joke of the Day

"I feel sorry for my testicles. They can't even hang out without being judged."

"Why shouldn't you argue with a 90 degree angle? It's always right."

"What were the Zodiac Killer's Plans for Vacation? To take a Cruz."

"Sorry I'm late... I was at the hospital *cough* my boyfriend has tuberculosis."

"When I'm not standing up or laying down, I have a seizure If I sit, I fit."

"Whats the difference between a USB and the USA? One has standards."

"I went to the Zoo today, only animal there was a dog... It was a Shih Tzu"

"I'm out of bed and dressed. What more do you want?"

"Gotta love those girls in department stores wearing lab coats--taking time away from their experiments to help women out with their makeup."

"I woke up suddenly terrified I'm late for work... I opened my eyes and chilled - I'm at work."