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Joke of the Day

"A man orders a coffee without milk. The barista replies, ""I'm sorry, we're out of milk. Can I get you a coffee without cream instead?"""

"Trump walks into a bar.... Because it was set so low."

"I call my penis Valyrian Steel.... Because it slays pale, icy bitches and no one really knows how it works."

"a quick zinger If your uncle jack helped you off a horse, would you help your uncle jack off a horse?"

"A priest ,a rabbi and a homeless man walk into a bar.. The homeless man order a beer while the rabbi and priest do jager bombs . Who's gonna pick up the tab?"

"I think my downstairs neighbors are beginning to suspect I'm living in their attic."

"What's the hardest part about cooking a vegetable? Getting the wheelchair in the pot."

"I've been shopping for my wife's birthday present. What did you get her? A bottle of expensive toilet water. It cost 20. 20! Why didn't you come to my house - you could have had some of ours for free!"

"What do you call an eternity? 4 blondes in 4 cars at a 4 way stop"

"""You got a friend in me"" - your friend's girlfriend"