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Joke of the Day

"I wonder if mormons support the transgendered? If they did, they could go on a transmission! -- authentic dadjoke overheard at breakfast"

"Never understood the desperation behind placing ur order in English at KFC/McD. Heard a guy practicing his order while sanding in the queue."

"I have a horrible sleeping disorder where I have to wake up every morning and go to work."

"A good way to know if your girlfriend is a lizard is if she eats a bunch of crickets or small birds"

"What do you call a boomerang that doesn't work? A stick. I'll see myself out now."

"Question for Waitresses who have served a Mohel... ...Did they leave a tip?"

"What's a terrorists favorite sports team? The new York jets."

"If you live by the sword, I guess that is pretty cool. I live by some trees and shit."

"A few days ago I went to a zoo and the only animal they had was a dog, so I left and went to Starbucks for a coffee... It was a shit coffee"

"If I ever get a dog I'm going to teach him how to fetch useful things like tv remotes, iPhones and men who like red wine."