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Joke of the Day

"A few days ago I went to a zoo and the only animal they had was a dog, so I left and went to Starbucks for a coffee... It was a shit coffee"

"What do you call it when you drown a baby in soda? Infantacide"

"What's the difference between the mailman and the priest? The mailman doesn't come on Sunday."

"It's impossible to describe why u are angry at a parent without sounding like a lunatic. ""They wanted me to eat salad! Can u believe that?"""

"A guy calls his wife to say he's had an accident at the factory He says, ""I got my finger cut off!"" She asks, ""The whole finger?"" He replies, ""No, the one next to it."""

"Bring a Knife on a date? When I see lovers' names carved in a tree, I don't think it's sweet. I just think it's surprising how many people bring a knife on a date."

"Dark humour is like a child with cancer It never gets old."

"What do cats eat on a hot summer day? Micecream!"

"Q: What's green and has wheels? A: Grass. I lied about the wheels."

"People who live in stone houses shouldn't throw glasses."