167531

Joke of the Day

"Never understood the desperation behind placing ur order in English at KFC/McD. Heard a guy practicing his order while sanding in the queue."

"My roommate is such a hypocrite when it comes to sharing. Apparently it's okay for him to finish my leftover pizza, but it's not okay for me to finish in his girlfriend."

"Why did the redditor cross the subreddit? To recycle a joke from the other side."

"Have you heard the one about the grain farmer? It was corny."

"There are 2 cats. One is called ""One Two Three"" and the other is called ""Un Deux Trois"", which is the best at swimming? ""One Two Three"" obviously. Because ""Un Deux Trois"" cat sank"

"I'm having one of those off days For example, this morning, I made a bowl of cereal, but instead of putting the milk back in the fridge and the cereal back in the pantry, I fucked my neighbors wife"

"ELI5 What happens when a high school calls in a replacement teacher for a subject they know nothing about? Ooops... wrong sub."

"what did one orphan say to the other Robin, get in the batmobile"

"Boss: Why is there an olive in your water? Me: What water? Oh yeah this, this is definitely water."

"My wife turns over and accidentally kicks me in the nuts. I gasp. She gasps. Then she raises her arms and yells, ""I WIN! I WIN!"""