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Joke of the Day

"What is the best part about a prostitute dying in the middle of your session? The next hour is free."

"What's a redneck's favourite vegetable? Pump-kin."

"INMATE: ""What are you in for?"" ME: ""A real treat, I hope."""

"My 5/o just said ""That's Classic!!"" WTF is classic to a 5 y/o? Blues Clues??"

"The amount of times I've had to say no to the Adobe Updater has totally prepared me to be a parent."

"A man has been killed after an E-cigarette exploded in his mouth. ""His face was a complete mess."" Said the coroner. ""But his lungs were mint."""

"Why do ninjas make bad porn stars? Because nobody can see them coming."

"What's black and white and red all over and can't get through a revolving door? A nun with a spear through her head."

"What do you call a kid with no friends (warning offensive) A sandy hook survivor."

"Lots of people cry while chopping onions. The trick is to not form an emotional attachment."