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Joke of the Day

"I can see myself going up in the world... The mirror in the elevator is pretty shiny."

"I tried killing a spider with kindness, but found that a shoe was much more effective"

"DA: Where r my legal briefs? Paralegal *hands him his boxers* Judge: lol Jury: We're hung Judge: ha! DA: Balls in your court Judge: DO MORE!"

"My girlfriend accused me of being a transvestite... ...So I packed her things and left."

"Christian Singles sounds like a Kraft product."

"Today I've heard the funniest joke ever. It was so funny."

"How did the redneck find the goat in the tall grass? Satisfying."

"Every time I go to get an HIV test, I'm convinced it's going to come back positive And every time, I'm right."

"Bad pirate jokes! I'll start. What be a pirate's favorite restaurant? You'd think it was Arby's, but it's actually Long John Silver's."

"I use to have a soap addiction... But I'm clean now"