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Joke of the Day

"My girlfriend accused me of being a transvestite... ...So I packed her things and left."

"I finally came out of the closet today... My mom then walks up to me, and says something to me. ""Holy fuck, How messy is your closet Joe? You have been in your closet for an entire month cleaning it!"""

"The best part of Halloween is all the Jehovah's Witnesses wondering why they're being given candy."

"What do quantum physicists do when life gives them lemons? Everything"

"Knuckle Tattoo Idea: * L I V I N G T O O C L O S E T O N U C L E A R W A S T E H A S D I S F I G U R E D M Y B O D Y K I L L M E *"

"I was thinking of ways to become transgender... So I figured I'd fly to Paris. Because then I'd be abroad."

"damn girl are you my old Gamecube? because for some reason i cant turn you on anymore but we used to have alot of fun"

"I always check my smoke alarms to make sure they're working. I call it ""cooking"""

"Watson returns from work one day... and finds Sherlock in bed with a very young girl. ""Christ, Sherlock! How old is this girl?"" ""Elementary, my dear Watson."""

"""I hate karaoke."" ""It's pronounced kah-rah-oh-keh."" ""Now, I hate you too."""