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Joke of the Day
"What came before the Big Bang? The Big Foreplay."
Next Joke
"I'm starting a talent agency that only represents those dudes in rap videos that just sorta stand around looking all hard."
"Why shouldn't white people go swimming? Nobody likes a soggy cracker!"
"A lettuce, a tomato and a pumpkin had a race The pumpkin fell down squash. The tomato tried to ketchup, but the lettuce came out ahead"
"TIL it's impossible to stick your tongue out and look up at the same time Without looking like a twat"
"They call it The ""I'm listening"". They call it The Dr. Crane. They call it... ... tossed salad and scrambled eggs."
"I was lost in the desert, out in the distance I thought I saw Nicki Minaj, when I ran up to her... She ended up being a Nicki Mirage"
"Her: How in the world did we max out the credit card?? Me: Beats me *pushes $20K worth of Care Bears under the bed"
"A couple of camels are walking in the dessert... And I was like: hey get out of my ice cream cake, you camels."
"If you're appraching a 5th wipe you should just take a shower."