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Joke of the Day

"I read an article about how much college will cost in 20 years so I'm scraping some paint chips off the house for my daughter to snack on."

"If you say ""Starbucks"" in the mirror 3 times, a girl in yoga pants will appear, steal your hoodie and tell you the best things about Fall."

"dyslexic x 2 1) Did you hear about the dyslexic agnostic insomniac? He laid awake at night wondering if there really was a Dog. 2) So, the dyslexic guy goes into a bra."

"But man says to the doctor: Wojak I am the pepe"

"Why did the dyslexic, Russian astronomer hate the revolution? He was following the Tsar."

"I bet firemen ""super-bidet"" each other when they're bored."

"What do you call someone with no body and no nose? Nobody Nose"

"I bought some rose-scented shampoo the other day.. ..it smells better than real poo."

"""I saw mommy kissing santa claus"" has the same number of syllables as ""I saw someone die at Disney World."" Life's funny like that."

"A guy walks into a bar ... and orders a drink."