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Joke of the Day

"I used to have a bird called ""Stockholm syndrome"" who lived on my shoulder. I used to hate the bastard, but in the end, he grew on me."

Next Joke
 
"the worst part of this guy catching me masturbating to a Highlights magazine is looking him in the eye for an hour while he cleans my teeth."
"Today is awesome. I got pulled over by a cop on a bike. He even asked if I knew why he was ""pulling me over"" You need a ride! Duh"
"Homes are 750 square feet larger today than they were 30 years ago. Unfortunately, so are most Americans."
"Zimbabweans have dismissed Mugabe rumour saying ""Mugabe cannot have a heart attack. He doesnt have a heart."""
"3 NoSql database admins went to a bar but came out immediately. Why? ... ... They could not find a table :P"
"*Smashes the Sony *Destroys the Panasonic *Pummels the Kenwood *Rips apart the Pioneer ~breaking all stereotypes"
"What is an epileptics favourite food? Seizure Salad"
"The last human alive will get no funeral."
"Q: What's black white and read all over? A: A newspaper."