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Joke of the Day

"What do you call a Dothraki mathematician? A Khal culator."

"Me: so I've been a little unclear regarding everything you've asked me to do since Monday Boss: Jesus Me: let me finish. In February. 2011."

"Why does snoop dog carry an umbrella? Fo drizzle."

"Yoda and Luke Skywalker are together in a ship when Luke asks... Luke: are we on track? Yoda: off course, we are."

"Who let the dogs out? ~~Redacted~~ let the dogs out. - NSA File # ~~Redacted~~"

"Why was the picture acquitted of the charge for murder? Because it was framed."

"My Mom called me a ""Son of a bitch"" today I told her I agree."

"What's the difference between a sliced up body and a new BMW? ... I don't have a new BMW in my garage."

"In light of Germany's discovery of ISIS using mustard gas: What do you call a soldier who's survived mustard gas and pepper spray? A seasoned veteran."

"When I was young I wanted to be smart, like my dad ... he also wants to be smart!"