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Joke of the Day

"What's the difference between a sliced up body and a new BMW? ... I don't have a new BMW in my garage."

"Why can't atheists solve exponential equations? They don't believe in higher powers."

"I came very close to death last night. I had a wank in a graveyard."

"Why does the hipster make crappy coffee? The beans are always under-ground."

"What's the difference between a personal trainer and a bully? None, they still take your money after beating you up. Edit: sorry for the typo."

"I wanted to propose to her. I wanted to propose her.I gave her a ring.What the heck,she won't pick up the phone."

"I play Jenga on our first date So she knows my pull out game is strong"

"The mathematician worked from home, Because he only functioned in his domain."

"Being cross-eyed has made it difficult for me to stay in monogamous relationships Sometimes when I'm seeing a girl I can't help but also see someone else on the side"

"Why does Teller piss everyone off when he leaves a party? Goes without saying"