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Joke of the Day

"You know what gets me down? Gravity..."

"Why was Latin afraid of Hitler? They were both dead!"

"What's the difference between a procrastinator and a prognosticator? Well, I haven't come up with the punchline yet, but you can probably see where I'm going with it."

"Bill Clinton is so getting laid tonight. Hillary is in Indonesia."

"I keep wanting to make a BDSM joke... ... but I keep getting tied up in the punchline."

"I worry about people who write ""taken"" in their bios. Where did they go? Who took them and why aren't we helping to find them?"

"A robot had an accident and sustained a head injury. He was a bit upset."

"There's a new drug that prevents statutory rape It's called RU18."

"*pulls out earbud* What? ""We need to talk."" *pulls out earbud* ""You've been spending too much time at Chernobyl."" *pulls out earbud* No way"

"I don't always give her an orgasm, but when I do.. She spits it back at me."