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Joke of the Day

"What do you do if your wife starts smoking? Slow down and use lubricant."

"What is happiess... Happiness is having a large, loving, caring, close-knit family in another city"

"My friends say I'm condescending... That means I talk down to people."

"Wanna hear my vegetable joke? Nah, It's too corny."

"I always wear an athletic cup. It's over-protection in a nut shell."

"How to get personal space If there's a lot of people, just yell ""Allahu Akbar"" for a rapid evacuation."

"Joseph was changing Jesus' diaper Joseph slowly takes out Jesus' dirty diaper, when Mary suddenly asks, ""What's inside?"". Joseph exclaimed ""Holy shit!""."

"MARRIAGE TIP: When your wife forgets to set the timer and incinerates dinner, DO NOT whistle ""If I Only Had a Brain"" from the Wizard of Oz."

"You've reached the Suicide Hotline. If you're clinically depressed, press 1. If you sent a tweet with a typo in it, press 2."

"What pokemon would you catch in Antarctica? Freezing."