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Joke of the Day
"Dad Joke - Did the melon get married without permission? No, it Cantelope."
Next Joke
"A small part of me is filled with self-loathing for how much pizza I can eat in one sitting. The rest of me is filled with pizza."
"What did the mama bison say to her son when he went off to college Bison. :> get it?"
"What does a terrorist and a soccer player have in common? Mossack Fonseca."
"What do goats do to get off? They pasturebate"
"A venn diagram is a lot like two fat people sitting next to each other... There's never enough space in the middle."
"My son asked me to get a tartan shirt for his birthday. So far I've only got him the prostitute."
"I'm the man putting sexy... .... back into dyslexic."
"What do you do if you fiend King Kong in the kitchen? Just don't monkey with him."
"What do you call a fish with no eyes? Blind, probably."