128542
Joke of the Day
"What do goats do to get off? They pasturebate"
Next Joke
"Did you hear about the guy who repeated a joke on /r/jokes? He insisted it wasn't a riposte."
"How do you get a fat person into bed? Piece of cake."
"Mom, don't freak out, but I'm in the hospital. NoUrImmature, you've been a doctor for eight years now. Please stop starting every phone conversation we have with that."
"Get a new car for your spouse - it'll be a great trade!"
"Ray Rice. Michael Vick. And now Adrian Peterson. Congratulations, NFL. Your woman/children/animal abuse trifecta is officially complete."
"My wife caught me measuring my dick. Embarrassing! It reached just to the back of her sister's throat."
"It's so humid today I keep expecting a southern lawyer to do his closing argument."
"[Ouija board in Starbucks] ""Speak to me spirits"" O M G H A V E U S E E N W H A T K R I S T Y I S W E A R I N G G R O S S"
"Quote of the day! ""When shits about to hit the fan... I turn the fan off"" -Pfaff"