47407
Joke of the Day
"What's the difference between an oral and rectal thermometer? The taste."
Next Joke
"If you enjoy waking up and checking to see what died, get a fish tank"
"My friend with OCD keeps hitting F5... he says he finds it refreshing. I told him he needs help, now he keeps hitting F1. (edit- thanks to r/supremesnicker for the better punchline.)"
"ceimr thats ""crime"" but in alphabetical order organized crime"
"Malaysian food is the best! Because it goes down easily"
"*running from cops* Me: hey wait hold up if we're gonna do this i really should be wearing my fitbit Cop: yeah me too good idea"
"Why did the old man buy his wig at the thrift store? Because he didn't want toupee."
"Why are Skeleton's so calm? Because nothing gets under their skin."
"Do you want to speak to the manager or someone who know's what's going on?"
"Why couldn't Batman go fishing? Because Robin ate the worms."