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Joke of the Day

"A man walks past someone brushing their teeth with toothpaste in a gated garden... ""Cool-gate, dude,"" he said."

"When I find myself saying something stupid, I finish by saying ""in this economy"" because that resonates with people in this economy."

"Wizard of Oz is the ultimate chick flick. Two women trying to kill each other over shoes. Brilliant, really."

"I'm reading a book about anti-gravity It's impossible to put down."

"Danger is my middle name. Avoid is my first, and Completely is my last. Nice to meet you."

"Why did the cultists drink the Kool-Aid? To get to the other side."

"What do cows say on Halloween? Still moo."

"Hey, NSA,,,, if you're going to read my posts, would it kill you to like them?"

"What did Jeffrey Dahmer say to Lorena Bobbit? ""You going to eat that?"""

"I'm not sure if putting Christmas lights up would offend my Jewish neighbours. So just to be sure, i'll hang a massive swastika in my window too."